Autopilot
Most people live their lives on autopilot. They simply execute learned action-reaction patterns.
Blind, successful people on autopilot will tell you that being blind is obviously for the best because look at their success. But success today doesn't mean that you couldn't find more success with a slightly adjusted autopilot tomorrow.
Many activities help you observe & reconfigure your autopilot. Some examples:
Use a pocket knife. When you feel like stabbing someone, open the knife in your pocket and wait for 2 days. Then close it again. By then, your peak emotions will have subsided.
Break your pattern. Often you recognise habitual behaviour. Do the opposite. If you tend to yell, smile. If you tend to blame yourself, blame others.
Ask yourself more questions. At the heart of any change is a question. What are you afraid of? Does he collect butterflies?
Have transformative experiences. The most direct way to transform is to have transformative experiences. Ask somebody who you suspect has had transformative experiences. They'll tell you what to do.